http://kattrip033.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] kattrip033.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] spn_on_parade2018-02-22 07:54 pm

Rise of the Minis

Title: Rise of the Minis
Fandom: Supernatural
Genre: Crack
Characters: Sam and Dean and a horde of Dean Funkos.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 384
Summary: The one where Dean pisses off a bunch of Funko dolls.
Spoilers/Warnings: None
A/N: For [livejournal.com profile] jj1564. I do not remember what she said that prompted me to write this, but I hope she enjoys it even though the Funkos are far more hostile than I originally intended. Crossposted from [livejournal.com profile] spn_bigpretzel
Disclaimer: I don’t own the characters and will not profit from their use.


The door bounced with the strain of being pushed in from the outside, while Dean used his body to hold it shut from the inside. Who knew something so small could be so strong? “Could you hurry up over there, Sam?!”

Sam looked up from where he had his books spread out around him. “Hey, I've never done this before! Besides, they're like three inches tall and made of plastic. How dangerous can they really be?”

“You weren't the one being stabbed by horde of little mini mes! And they're made of vinyl.” Being knocked down and attacked by hundreds of little Deans, with their big dead eyes and mouthless faces wasn't something he was apt to forget anytime soon.

“Yeah, well I'm not the one who thought it would be cool to visit an alternate universe populated by sentient toys!” Sam angrily flipped a page and continued his rant. “Everywhere we go, you have to touch everything! It even had a warning! 'Do not use key. Natives hostile.' Seriously.”

“Who knew that a bunch of toys would be blood thirsty and violent? But it's pretty cool that there are toys of us in an alternate universe, right?” Dean grinned.

Sam glared back.

“Oh, come on. You're just mad most of the Sams got melted by the Godzilla windup toys.”

“If you hadn't sided with the movie monster toys, the Deans wouldn't have followed us for revenge!”

“The uses were trying to kill us, Sam.”

“Because you stepped on their car!”

“It was an accident! Like I would intentionally hurt Baby in any universe!”

The banging at the door stopped.

“That can't be good.” Cautiously, Dean stepped away from the door, gun in hand, and opened it slowly. The Funko army was nowhere to be seen. He stepped out into the hallway. Sam followed him.

“Do you think they left?”

“Since when do we ever get that luckily?” Dean added glibly.

They followed the sound of tiny feet and rummaging to the kitchen. The Funkos were arming themselves with kitchen knives and charged at noticing the human Winchester brothers.

“Flame thrower?”

Sam nodded. “Flame thrower.”

If they couldn't de-animate them or send them back. They were going to melt the little bastards.